Things that I did not know until I became a mom

As I'm looking at the shambles that used to be my pristinely clean house, I started thinking of all the things that I didn't know until I became a mom. I'm sure there are many others that I will forget, please feel free to list them.
1. It takes 4 1/2 hours to get the house clean...and approximately .37 seconds for it to return to looking like a disaster area.
2. When a 3 year old voluntarily approaches you to say "I'm sorry I made a little mess, Mommy" it translates to "Please don't give me the spank that I totally deserve for dumping out all the sugar on the carpet."
3. A one year old that is hungry WILL headbutt you in the face, and it hurts. A lot.
4. When everything is quiet, refer to #2
5. Plastic bags from the grocery store are just as much fun as the fancy, talking, blinky light, learning toys that I thought were "cute AND educational".
6. It takes about half an hour for those fancy toys to go from "cute and educational" to "annoying and about to get bashed to pieces if it doesn't shut up". *yes, Evie, I know - we don't say shut up*
7. The middle seat is the prime real estate in a suburban and there will be hairpulling and punching if Mom doesn't intervene to rectify the situation and figure out "who called it" and "who had it last time".
8. When baby #1 is colicky, baby #2 is just as stressful because every moment that it is not crying, you think something is wrong.
9. Even the best of intentions for a fun activity with the kids can get shot to hell by a trip to the bathroom which leaves the children unsupervised. (ie. the chocolate cupcakes that we were decorating happily which I returned to find crumbled throughout the carpet...ALL over the house and on the stairs.)
10. Honesty is NOT always the best policy. Sometimes silence is better than "You have a really big bum, Mommy."
11. Hearing "You're the best Mom in the whole world!" after a fun trip to the park makes everything worth it.

Barf

One of the things I am the least proud of about myself is my inability to handle barf with any kind of class. I'm not exactly sure why, but when someone is throwing up my initial reaction is to RUN in the opposite direction. When this is not possible, for some reason (I am a bad person for this I know it) I have a hard time even conjuring up sympathy for the person, and actually if I'm being totally honest I feel angry with them for making me feel so uncomfortable.
Enter Ellie Louise. I'm not sure if this child just has a weak stomach or just gets sick often, but she barfs a lot. Usually on Junior and usually in the car. Tonight was the 4th time in the last year that she has barfed in the car, and probably about the 6th or 7th time that it has been on Junior. She is trying her hardest to cure me of my irrational phobia, and I actually think I am showing improvement. I DID feel sorry for her, I DIDN'T run away and I DIDN'T feel angry at all! I just reread that last sentence and I am definitely a bad person.

New house:)

We finally closed on our house and we will get the keys on Tuesday! Hurray! This will be move number 7 within the last 18 months. And I really can't even say *hopefully this will be the last one* because that would mean that Junior doesn't get picked up by a team this season.
And on a completely unrelated note, why do I keep getting spam in my email box about colon cleansing? Does anyone know? I have very few websites that I visit frequently - mostly silly scrapbooking ones, so I honestly have no idea where a colon cleansing company would have gotten my email address from. Oh well. Pictures of the house to come later.

Welcome to our blog:)

So once again I'm the last one to jump on the bandwagon. It seems to be a pattern in my life that I'm just a couple steps behind the current trend. I'm starting this blog mostly to document stories about my kids...in particular my little Ellie. Her shenanigans are a daily occurance, but some of the things she does are just so unbelievable that I feel like I need to preserve the stories. For instance, one of my personal favorites is the time that I left Evie and Ellie to color while I snuck off to nurse the baby to sleep. Now, if you were a 2 year old with a crayon and decided to be naughty, what would you do? Write on the walls, right? Oh no. That's too predictable for Ellie. She took her crayon, opened the fridge, and poked a hole in all of the eggs. I don't know how diligent I will be about updating our blog, but I thought it would be fun to try.